Do not explain yourself! Those who ask you for explanations do not need them, and those who need them will not ask, because they trust you and know you will give them anyway.
People who ask you for explanations already have a preconceived idea of what they want to hear. If you do not tell them what they want to hear, their passive-aggressive—or perhaps outright aggressive—side will come out, because your “explanation” already exists in their minds, and it does not match what you are going to tell them.
Do not play their game. Explanations are only for those willing to listen. How do you know who is willing to listen? Switch on your radar and look for the people who truly care about you.
The people who care about you are not always the ones at home. Those who really do care see you with respect, love, and compassion. They are people you know you can count on without even having to ask. They are the ones who rejoice in your achievements, who go out of their way to take your mind off things when you have had a bad day, who do even what seems impossible to make you laugh. They are the people who recognize you as an essential part of their lives, people whose lives you enrich, directly or indirectly.
People who demand explanations from you are acting out of ego and fear, out of a desire to control—yes, to control your life. These people are so dissatisfied and ashamed of their own lives that they try to find any “flaw” or problem in yours to feel “less bad” about their own. They want to control your life when they cannot control their own, just to feel less miserable about the life they chose.
You decide: give them explanations, drain your energy, exhaust yourself, and become frustrated because they will reproach you and mistreat you psychologically and emotionally for anything you say, or protect your peace and take away their control over your life.
“Do not offer so many explanations: your friends do not need them, your enemies do not believe them, and fools do not understand them.”